Written by: nmerritt11 5/8/2010 8:52 AM
There are some things that just chap my hyde and today I bring to you just a few of them. During the off-season as I scroll message board forums and read some of the absolute horse shit that fans think is interesting topics of conversation. It is easy to put my finger on what is wrong with the average fan. There is always a common theme amoungst these “uneducated” college football fans. Whether from the left coast, southern, northern, or mid-west they all seem to follow the same “Football Posting for Dumb Asses” instruction manual. So today, nmerritt wants to bring you a few rules to abide by in order to not come across as the village idiot! Dont be a Dumb ASS Don't Take things so Personal: Not everyone likes your team and people are going to trash talk them. Facts are facts! Use them to defend your argument. Do not stoop to the “my dad can beat up your dad” or “my dick is bigger than your”s style arguments. They just don't work! Lay out facts, make your case, and stay calm. As soon as you start to take it personal, consider the thread hijacked and await the sharks to attack because you have now become easy prey. In other word wear your adult britches out to play and you will be amazed at the respectful conversations you can have even when people disagree and realize you are a rah tard! Do not use your spring game as a way to gage your teams next season: Remember spring games are nothing more than a carnival for the average fan. The playbooks are dumbed down, the players aren't going 100%, and the coaching staff is not going to be spending much time reviewing the video. If the back-up QB looks better than the starter, DO NOT be the guy starting a thread about a QB controversy! The back-up QB is always the idiot fan favorite! You do not get BCS Standing points if you beat your own team. It will not help you get into the National Championship game even if you hang 50 on your #1 defense. Recruiting Rankings don't mean shit: I do not know about you but I don't remember the last time a rivals reporter won a football game for anyone. Once a player enters into college practice the stars next to his name disappear like my dick on a cold day. Games are not won on paper and players don't develop by playing NCAA 2011 in their dorm rooms. Just because a guy has 5-stars next to his name when he walks on campus does not mean he is better than the 3-Star guy sitting in front of him on the spring depth chart. See Colt McCoy and Jevon Snead. Average fans, if you don't remember this QB battle put down the “Posting for Dumb Asses” manual and do a google search. Might impress your internet buddies with some facts. The Only Bias is in your Head: win and you will be in. There is no East Coast, West Coast, SEC, Big 10, or Fuckin Fat Chicks bias in college football. This is the most lame argument in the history of college football. When Southern Cal is good, ESPN strokes their cock better than Jenna Jameson and when the SEC is the best conference in college football sports talk radio licks their nuts with a 10 inch tongue. I would say when Notre Dame is relevant the world rotates around South Bend but lets face it, the last time they were worth a damn, TV's were still black and white with rabbit ears so no need to even go there. If your team sucks do not use your Conference as the Reason: The conference argument is about as cool as saying “No I didn't fuck Erin Andrews but I know a guy who did!” If it is not you, does it really count? Don't use the argument “Well if we were in the Big East or the ACC we would have won 10 games this year.” Refer to rule number 1. You are in that conference so learn to win in that conference or shut the fuck up. The we are in the best conference so we deserve respect attitude instantly gives you troll status. This is even worse than the wait till next year comment. I hope this helps. This is just part 1 of more to come for Rules of posting. Stay tuned and you too can become a quality poster!
There are some things that just chap my hyde and today I bring to you just a few of them. During the off-season as I scroll message board forums and read some of the absolute horse shit that fans think is interesting topics of conversation. It is easy to put my finger on what is wrong with the average fan. There is always a common theme amoungst these “uneducated” college football fans. Whether from the left coast, southern, northern, or mid-west they all seem to follow the same “Football Posting for Dumb Asses” instruction manual. So today, nmerritt wants to bring you a few rules to abide by in order to not come across as the village idiot!
Dont be a Dumb ASS
Don't Take things so Personal: Not everyone likes your team and people are going to trash talk them. Facts are facts! Use them to defend your argument. Do not stoop to the “my dad can beat up your dad” or “my dick is bigger than your”s style arguments. They just don't work! Lay out facts, make your case, and stay calm. As soon as you start to take it personal, consider the thread hijacked and await the sharks to attack because you have now become easy prey. In other word wear your adult britches out to play and you will be amazed at the respectful conversations you can have even when people disagree and realize you are a rah tard!
Do not use your spring game as a way to gage your teams next season: Remember spring games are nothing more than a carnival for the average fan. The playbooks are dumbed down, the players aren't going 100%, and the coaching staff is not going to be spending much time reviewing the video. If the back-up QB looks better than the starter, DO NOT be the guy starting a thread about a QB controversy! The back-up QB is always the idiot fan favorite! You do not get BCS Standing points if you beat your own team. It will not help you get into the National Championship game even if you hang 50 on your #1 defense.
Recruiting Rankings don't mean shit: I do not know about you but I don't remember the last time a rivals reporter won a football game for anyone. Once a player enters into college practice the stars next to his name disappear like my dick on a cold day. Games are not won on paper and players don't develop by playing NCAA 2011 in their dorm rooms. Just because a guy has 5-stars next to his name when he walks on campus does not mean he is better than the 3-Star guy sitting in front of him on the spring depth chart. See Colt McCoy and Jevon Snead. Average fans, if you don't remember this QB battle put down the “Posting for Dumb Asses” manual and do a google search. Might impress your internet buddies with some facts.
The Only Bias is in your Head: win and you will be in. There is no East Coast, West Coast, SEC, Big 10, or Fuckin Fat Chicks bias in college football. This is the most lame argument in the history of college football. When Southern Cal is good, ESPN strokes their cock better than Jenna Jameson and when the SEC is the best conference in college football sports talk radio licks their nuts with a 10 inch tongue. I would say when Notre Dame is relevant the world rotates around South Bend but lets face it, the last time they were worth a damn, TV's were still black and white with rabbit ears so no need to even go there.
If your team sucks do not use your Conference as the Reason: The conference argument is about as cool as saying “No I didn't fuck Erin Andrews but I know a guy who did!” If it is not you, does it really count? Don't use the argument “Well if we were in the Big East or the ACC we would have won 10 games this year.” Refer to rule number 1. You are in that conference so learn to win in that conference or shut the fuck up. The we are in the best conference so we deserve respect attitude instantly gives you troll status. This is even worse than the wait till next year comment.
I hope this helps. This is just part 1 of more to come for Rules of posting. Stay tuned and you too can become a quality poster!
Copyright ©2010 nick merritt
4 comments so far...
Re: For Fans by a Fan! Don't Be A Dumb Ass! SEC! SEC! SEC!!J/K...Excellent stuff Nick....can't wait for part II
Re: For Fans by a Fan! Don't Be A Dumb Ass!
SEC! SEC! SEC!!J/K...Excellent stuff Nick....can't wait for part II
Re: For Fans by a Fan! Don't Be A Dumb Ass! Takes an arse to know an arse!Good blog, sir!.)
Takes an arse to know an arse!Good blog, sir!.)
Re: For Fans by a Fan! Don't Be A Dumb Ass! thanks fellas!!! part 2 won't be far behind. gotta have something to do during the off season! and yes i am an arse
thanks fellas!!! part 2 won't be far behind. gotta have something to do during the off season! and yes i am an arse
Re: For Fans by a Fan! Don't Be A Dumb Ass! You just took all my reasons for posting in the first place! J/K!
You just took all my reasons for posting in the first place! J/K!